Another month has gone by . . .

Another month has gone by and as is my wont, another post sneaks in.  I read posts from The Daily Stoic and in light of todays world, these words make a lot of sense.  Nothing really has changed in our world except the packaging.

It doesn’t matter who you are, the facts are the same. Marcus Aurelius was Emperor. Epictetus was a slave. Two different fates, but the same reality. Most of life, most situations are out of our control. All we can do is respond to them well. All we can do is endure them.

In December 1950, the United States was deep into the war in Korea. It seemed likely that the conflict would spiral out of control. What would happen next? What could one do? Was it hopeless? Whose fault was it? As Secretary of State, Dean Aiken struggled under this burden. He got a letter from his old friend, the foreign policy visionary George Keenan. It’s advice that bucks you up whether you’re fighting for the future of the free world, or just trying to make it through high school. And here it is:

“In international as in private life, what counts most is not what happens to someone, but how he bears what happens to him. For this reason, almost everything depends from here on out on the manner in which we Americans bear what is unquestionably a major failure and disaster to our national fortunes. If we accept it with candor, with dignity with the resolve to absorb its lessons and make it good by redoubled and determined effort, starting all over again, if necessary, along the pattern of Pearl Harbor, we need lose neither our self confidence nor our allies, nor our powers for bargaining. But if we try to conceal from our own people, or from our allies, the full measure of our misfortune, or permit ourselves to seek relief in any reactions of bluster or petulance or hysteria, we can easily find this crisis resolving itself into an irreparable deterioration of our world position, and of our confidence in ourselves.”

We’ve talked before about this kind of paradox in stoicism. The stoics were boldly optimistic and ruthlessly pragmatic. They always believed that they could endure the worst circumstances and they accepted the brutal facts of those circumstances. They saw the unquestionable major disaster and the unprecedented major opportunity.

As Ryan Holiday writes in Lives of the Stoics (which you can pick up at The Daily Stoic Store), Xeno loses his entire fortune in a shipwreck. But by bearing this with grace and fortitude, he was able to discover a philosophy that changed the world. Marcus was the leader of Rome through a series of crises that matched Truman’s: a war and a 15-year pandemic. Cato faced a republic on the brink of collapse. Seneca, Musonius Rufus, Agrippinus, Rutilius, and Helvidius, all were exiled.

These were difficult moments, but they bore them well with competence, dignity, candor, most of all unflappable perseverance. They might have temporarily bemoaned it, but they knew, as Epictetus knew, that becoming an Olympic class athlete takes sweat. So they stuck to it, just as you must.

Adventures on the Mississippi River bottom

As most people know by this, the Mississippi River has reached historic lows. Because of that old stories are appearing, many for the first time and river traffic has slowed to a halt. The slowdown/stoppage of barge transport, though playing havoc on the economy, hasn't stopped people from going to the river to explore. And so it was that we recent, with a couple of friends, with off on our own adventure.

We arrived at Cottonwood Point in Southeastern Missouri and found several tugs hard at work along with barges stacked by the shoreline waiting to be moved. This alone would have been enough but then, like the Statue of Liberty unexpectedly appearing at the end of Planet of the Apes, a relic from the river arose out of the sand.

As the work went on around us, I approached the risen treasure and, of course, had to strike my pose. Then I discovered the remains of fish, their skin, bones, bits and pieces. I couldn't help but wonder if they had been left behind trapped in small, drying pools of river water.

I made the circuit around this great old relic and found more fish bones. We thought they might be something else but decided, nope, it was more fish bones. Don's hand shows the scale. Seeing this really was an amazing experience.

Heading back to the truck and random pictures for the wrap-up. Our friend Mike had the good idea of driving down the ramp to save us the walk back up. Unfortunately, that didn't work out too well and we were well and truly stuck. Luckily, we live in a world where good Samaritans are living, breathing realities, one cute, furry friend included. Connect one 4-wheel drive to one tow strap and we were out and heading home.

Reflections on Death and Punishment

 INTRODUCTION

I write here today to grow in understanding of my faith in God and, in particular, in my understanding of the Resurrection of the Dead.  During a final study group meeting at church, the subject of purgatory came up and suddenly I realized that I had many questions and some misunderstandings about the nature of death, judgment, and purgatory.  It occurred to me that a combined review of the Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC) and the Baltimore Catechism might focus my confusion and provide an anchor for gaining some answers. 

As I approached this study, I first turned to a prayer I could say at the beginning of every writing session.  I also asked, at the same time, for a patron saint of writing and I was presented with St. Catherine of Bologna.  Her book, “The Seven Spiritual Weapons” will eventually appear on my bookshelf.  But for now, and most importantly, I have incorporated her into my prayer for guidance, direction, and focus.

Father, guide my thoughts, Guardian Angel, guide my hands, St. Catherine of Bologna, stand by me as teacher and mentor as I journey in my quest for increased knowledge and understanding.  Amen

    

Approaching this task, I turned to the Catechism of the Catholic Church and noted the pages referencing Understanding, Knowledge, and the Resurrection of the Dead.  These areas of the CCC would give shape to my growth in knowledge and understanding of the Church’s teaching on this matter.

In starting any piece of writing, the opening line(s) is always the hardest for me.  Establishing the starting point is critical.  If I get it wrong, I usually find myself going down a rabbit hole of misdirection and then have to start all over again.  And the rabbit hole was definitely waiting for me.  I took note of the first reference beneath my reading notes on Understanding and turned to CCC 223.  As I read it, I was surprised that it made no sense and that I was, in fact, in the wrong part of the book. I checked back at my original references and there was nothing mentioning 223. 

I cannot explain it but it seems that the Holy Spirit intervened to point me in the right direction and my guardian angel made sure I was listening and got the message.  CCC 223 speaks to the implications of faith in one God and in particular coming to know God’s greatness and majesty.  At last, I had order.  Before understanding, you must have knowledge.  Before knowledge you must recognize God’s greatness and majesty.

KNOWLEDGE

As a youngster and teens, I grew up with the Baltimore Catechism.  There was daily religion study through 2^nd grade and it picked up again in 8^th grade.  In-between, depending on where we lived and the parish schedule, when I enrolled in public schools, I would attend Catechism once a week on a Wednesday or a Saturday.  The awareness of lifelong learning being a truism was brought home to me again this week when I discovered that my idea of the disposition of the soul after death was a bit skewed.  I knew that the soul had one of three destination after death, heaven, purgatory, or hell.  But, in our culture, the remembering of our loved ones in heaven is common.  In fact, common enough that the in-between state might be easily overlooked.  And, then there is the final resurrection with the return of Jesus Christ to earth. If the soul isn’t in heaven, if we are, in reality, waiting for the final judgement, why are we assuming our loved ones are in heaven?  Why do we automatically believe that a mortally sinful person is in hell?  Where and when do we step back from judging a soul’s disposition and, instead, proceed to knowledge and embrace understanding?

UNDERSTANDING

My answers are clearly laid out in the Catechism of the Catholic Church and the Baltimore Catechism, the catechism of my youth.  There is an enormous difference between the two; not in what is taught but in the depth of what is taught.  There is an orderliness and structure in the Baltimore Catechism that I find more comfortable to learn from and I believe my simple and straightforward belief springs from its more streamlined structure.  When I was young, I didn’t need the details to hold the beliefs.  It was my uncluttered, uncomplicated pathway to truth.

This uncomplicated structure also influenced my writing style.  I’m a less-is-more person, more Hemingway than Faulkner. I’m essays and short stories, not full blown novels.  I’m attracted to the writings of Pope Benedict XVI and Cardinal Robert Sarah, and not so much to Saint Pope John Paul II and others who came before him.  But, as in all things, we grow and mature.  We are effected by outside influences.  We question.  So when I confronted my sudden confusion about the afterlife, it seemed only natural to turn to my old friend, the Baltimore Catechism.

In Volumes I and II, the Baltimore Catechism instruction on death and judgment is straight-forward.  Young minds receive uncomplicated explanations.  What is this?  This is that.  Young minds got the basic message.  I did.  Many others did too and the simple explanation served us well.  Volume III offered a bit more depths and Volume IV expanded with a final lesson for maturing minds.  It was a good starting point.

But somewhere along my own personal journey to knowledge, the right understanding of what it all meant became vague and confused.  The world interfered. I derailed from the Faith.  It all became meaningless.  By the time I returned, the Church had changed. The 70’s and most of the 80’s had flown by and what I returned to was not recognizable.  Fast-forward to 2022 and the question of death and judgment had been lurking for a while.  The children were raised.  They were grown, gone, and making families of their own.  And it all is happening for them within the loving embrace of the Faith, for which I am eternally grateful.  They are so beyond me in knowledge now and it’s time for me to catch up.

So, why the confusion?  Is the noise of the world and the diversity of opinion so glaring that truth is buried under the sheer weight of it?  In a word – Yes.  Cutting through all of the noise, I asked myself four questions.

1.      What happens after death?

2.      Will I be accepted, condemned, or something in between?

3.      If in between, what does that mean?

4.      How and when do we know our final destination before His return?

5.      What are the tools He gives us?

What Happens After Death?

As a child, we are taught that we are judged immediately after death.  Our faith and actions measure the love we have shared in our life. Though we likely have not arrived at the end of time and Christ’s return, we are still judged or condemned.  We are introduced to the idea of purgatory as a stop on our journey to heaven and union with God.

Will I be accepted, condemned, or something in between?

By the time we are older, in our teens, we have presumably matured into the understanding that purgatory is a place of purification where, through spiritual suffering, we are cleansed of our venial sins.  We cannot enter into the glory of God without this cleansing.   

If a soul is burdened with mortal sin without repentance, the soul and body is condemned to everlasting suffering.  But, as humans we cannot know the mind of God nor the heart of an individual at death.  We cannot judge what we do not know so we are meant to pray for the individual, even one who is known to be evil in life.  Their Particular Judgment is not ours to know or make.

We are given all the tools we need in life to enter the Kingdom of God at our deaths.  His grace, mercy, and love are abundant.  But it is how we use these tools that determines if we are raised to glory immediately upon death, or we are consigned to purgatory for a period of cleansing, or we are condemned to Hell.

What is the In Between?

Purgatory is a place of spiritual suffering for the cleansing of our venial sins. Since our body is separated from our soul after death, the suffering of purgatory is not physical.   It is a time when we face our sinfulness in order to be cleansed, to be washed clean, but it isn’t necessarily an entirely painful process. As we journey through our time of cleansing, we also know joy, the joy of the knowledge that we will eventually be gathered into the glory of God.  This is why it is important that we pray for the souls in purgatory.  They cannot pray for themselves but, to grow in selflessness, they can pray for others.  And I imagine this would also include praying for fellow souls in purgatory since the prayers would not be directed at themselves.   This thought is merely conjecture on my part.  Nothing is said in the catechism about this specifically.  We only know that the souls of purgatory can pray for others.

How can we know our final destination before His return?

The simplest answer is that He lets us know.  At an early age, we are taught of the Particular Judgment, that judgment that happens immediately after death.  We understand that being lifted to Heaven or being assigned to Purgatory are the goals we need to strive for.  The tools of using His mercy and Grace and Love are the roads to ultimate union with God.  At death, if we are consigned to Hell, there is no last chance.  If a soul is condemned to Hell, the soul AND body suffer with the knowledge that they failed in life to use the tools He gave us to forge a path to His Glory.  The way of judgment has never been a secret.

We then learn, with His return, the disposition of all souls that went before us, the General Judgment.  We witness the beneficent love of God.  His generosity becomes known to all as well as His fair and final condemnation.  For one who has had little and suffered much in life but loved, there is a reward.  For one who has had much in life but has loved little, there is condemnation.  To love insufficiently, no matter how little or how much you have in life, is the wide road to Hell.  In short, a place in Heaven cannot be bought. 

What are the tools He gives us to gain Heaven?

God offers us many ways to grow in friendship with Him.  Pray.  Do good works.  Examine our conscience daily.  Ask for forgiveness.  Offer an Act of Contrition after the examination. We cannot know the date and time of our death (Matt. 24:36) so it isn’t enough to plan to do better.  Always strive to do better and make amends for past errors.   What good is it for someone to gain the whole world yet forfeit their soul? (Mark 8:36)

CONCLUSION

It is through prayer and being open to the prompting of the Holy Spirit that will lead us on our quest for knowledge, understanding, and ultimately friendship and union with God.  Study. Talk with others. Listen to the small voice that nags with a particular thought.  It isn’t easy.  The world is full of distractions and sparkly things that to delays and procrastination.  We are full of good intentions to pursue the questions but the Evil One does not want us to look too deeply and the important questions so he will always throw up an interruption or create some kind of commotion that will occupy our attention instead of pursue our question for knowledge, understanding, and unity with God.

My Heart

It was a surprising summer.  I went from freakishly healthy to Covid, followed by pneumonia, back to back.  It was exhausting.  Eventually I recovered and got on with my life.  Then . . . 

. . . On a Sunday morning, just a few weeks ago, I awoke with my chest feeling so tight and my jaw and teeth hurting so badly, I hardly recognized myself.  The feeling of distress passed in about 30 minutes but I was so tired from it that I skipped Mass and just rested.  When Don came home, I had already been called  by Sr. Sharon.

It was Sr. Sharon who informed me that I had experienced the classic symptoms of a warning sign for heart attacks in women.  Later my daughter-in-law confirmed it.  With that I decided to call and make an appointment with my doctor.  That call on Monday morning had me in his office Monday afternoon.

A thorough physical, lots of questions, and one EKG later, I was referred to the Stern Cardiovascular Clinic in Germantown just outside of Memphis, TN.  Dr. Gubin, who for 17 years running, has been acknowledged as the #1 heart doctor in Tennessee as now MY doctor.  

Normally there would have been a report on all the tests I had by now but lucky me, a week before my episode, their system had been hacked.  It's "functional" now but according to Aubry, Dr. Gubin's secretary, who I just spoke to, they are limping along.  She did tell she received my earlier message and she sent the information to Lee Miles, RN, who is Dr. Gubin's lead nurse.

So no information yet beyond the sketchiest of details and, for the time being, I'm feeling fine. I DO carry Nitro tablets with me and if I feel the tight squeezing sensation again to take the tablet and follow instructions. After 2 doses five minutes apart from each other and 10 minutes, if there is no relief, get to ER and call Dr. Jordan.  I have his direct number.

I feel I am in very good hands and am grateful to have access to such a fine local doctor and such an excellent cardiovascular clinic.  In a rural area, this is a lot more than I would have expected.

Covid, etc.

 The summer has been long and hot.  Predictable but what I find interesting is that the heat has been throughout the country.  When the rain comes it dumps intensely in a small area.  Case in point - St. Louis a week or so ago.  St. Louis received a record rainfall in one 24 hour period of 9 inches.  The last time this happened that was even close was in 1915 with a rainfall of 7 inches.  The flooding, as you can imagine, has been terrible.  

Rain finally arrived in the Bootheel today and we are grateful.  The heat has been relieved with the temperature at 72 degrees in the middle of the afternoon..  It was a slow and steady rain and I don't think there was any damage to the crops.  The farmers are definitely happy

We have visited with the kids this summer both here and there, in Indy and Fairview, TN.  But, the most interesting thing that happened was we were finally visited by Covid.  

Interestingly, Don was not as sick as I was and on top of that, when I thought I was recovered, I really wasn't.  I couldn't shake a persistent cough and breathiness.  I visit the doctor again, had chest x-rays, and lo and behold, I discovered that I had pneumonia.  I was gobsmacked.  Me???  Pneumonia???  That was a hard one to wrap my head around.  

As I've gotten older, I've become more watchful of my health.  When I was younger and raising kids, I wasn't allowed to be sick.  It just wasn't done.  If I was ever sick, I ignored it.  But now I have time to pay attention to my own issues and seeing the doctor was a smart move because I caught it early.  If I had waited or ignored it, I would have likely ended up in hospital.  Nice to know that I've gotten smarter as I've gotten older.

Summer is still here.  August arrives tomorrow.  More heat for many but school starts for some and Krista is now homeschooling the kids.  In today's social climate, it's a smart choice.

Reflection on Texas

 I've been thinking a lot about Texas today like everyone else. The question "Why?" echoes in my mind and it's hard to stop. Granted there is a lot I don't understand about the horror of this event. What sane person could?  But one thing I do know for sure, it doesn't have anything to do with gun control and the second amendment.  What I do believe is that we are infected with a societal sickness and divisions that are destroying our country in a way that effects all our relationships and interactions profoundly. Politicizing the deaths of children won't do anything except make our social sickness worse.  

Did you know that between 1903 and 1981 there were 128 school related incidents in our country?  That's 77 years. Some resulted in deaths, others did not.  Between 1981 and 1993, a mere 12 years, there were 77 school related incidents.  There were 72 during Clinton's administration alone. It dropped to 56 under Bush II. Over 8 years there were 127 under Obama, Trump had 118 in four years.  And now, in less than 2 years, Biden's administration has recorded 50.  At that rate, at the end of this term he will have exceeded Trump.  

I don't blame guns. I don't blame presidents. I blame the sickness that is swamping our country and it all happened without regard to political party.  

Anger and blaming does nothing except muddle our thinking and I would say that to anyone no matter what their political beliefs.

Why do I happen to know all of the above? I know these facts because I became interested in the problem.  You can't be part of a solution and gain understand until you have knowledge.  Each incident stands by itself and the eruption of its putrid stench makes us ill. But we can't really know how bad it is until we step back and look at the big picture.   When we see it in the frame of 122 years, THEN we know how bad our condition really is.

Time Flew

 My last post was in September.  What happened to time?  October and November slipped into December.  Christmas became January and the month is almost half gone. 

The river is rising again and the fog encroaches more and more.

Children explore the mysteries of the backwaters.

A spiral staircase with no beginning and no end.

A light snow at Thanksgiving became a failed promise of more winter.

And yet again I am writing, adding to, and gathering 50 years of poetry

for my next book entitled

Scenes from a Slow-Moving Train:

A Diary of Emotions